Felicity’s Story

1964 - Current

In June 2013, Felicity Munsamy was a proud, confident 52-year-old. Felicity was fortunate, as her employer’s wife, whom she was friends with, owned a medical centre, and Felicity was able to go for frequent health screenings and mammograms. She felt a lump in her breast, and it was painful to the touch. 

She immediately asked for a screening test. A mass was detected, and a biopsy was sent off. It was cancer. Her breast had to be removed, with no time to spare. Along with this diagnosis came a heaviness, that seeped into the Munsamy family, her children, and grandchildren. One that, 10 years later still has them in its grip, enslaving them in limbo. She is neither sick nor well, simply in the in-between, along with all those who love her. 

Simply put, Felicity was never the same. Her life can be divided into all that was before November 2016 and all that was after November 2016. She lost herself in terror, fear consumed her, and she started researching on Google, working herself into an absolute panic and distress, with this panic spreading into her family with far-reaching consequences. Those that had to be strong for her, were crippled with stress and worry.

Her right breast was removed and followed by an immediate reconstruction. Shortly after that, Felicity got the green light. She was cancer-free. However, Felicity herself was not free.

This may have been the end of a battle, what lies ahead was and still is a crippling psychological war that nobody seems to understand. 

Felicity’s mind was altered. She no longer trusts her own body and is paranoid, nervous, and worries constantly about herself, her children, and her grandchildren. She expects the worst, and her fear is at times irrational. She truly feels that nobody understands her. 

Her attitude about her physical appearance and state of health and wholeness has broken down. Her trust in her body has broken down. The changes in her appearance led to a negative body image and various psychological problems. Felicity’s paranoia about her health and that of her family is borderline obsessive. She is not living every day to the fullest, instead living in fear.

Cancer to her, was a thief. 

The loss of her breast has had a dramatic impact on her body image, she is ashamed of her appearance, and perceived loss of femininity and body integrity. 

For Felicity, the scale of the psychological reaction to the removal of a breast is very closely related to her sense of emotional wellness. 

Felicity’s near-obsessive fear of her cancer returning may have her in her doctor’s room with every ache and pain, and it does not stop with her. She urges her children and grandchildren to go for regular check-ups. 

While Felicity and her family members appreciate the hype that BCA campaigns create, and her daughter's own words, “I will wear pink, and smile and participate”, I sometimes just wish that someone would ask her “How are you doing”.

The result of her mastectomy was much more than a change in Felicity’s body image. Providing professional psychological support for the patients after mastectomy is overlooked. This discussion led us to believe that Felicity will benefit immensely from support groups of women (and men) who face the same difficulties and how much lighter a burden may feel if it is carried together.

Our wish is that Felicity’s story will evoke not only awareness of breast cancer itself but also the stigma, trauma, and psychological agony that lasts long after a patient is in remission. They are not well until they are mentally well. These women are alive, but not living. 

For Felicity, mother of Premilla Calvin (Candidate Consultant, Network IT Recruitment)