Hilda's Story

1914 - 2000

On a Tuesday morning in 1976, a fiercely independent Hilda Loder, 62, mother of six young women, went for a normal routine checkup at Addington Hospital in Durban. Little did she know that her life was about to change irrevocably in an instant.

The Doctor discovered the unthinkable. Her left breast was bleeding from the nipple, and the hospital ran tests. Within a day the devastating diagnosis came, it was breast cancer, and she was booked into theatre for a mastectomy of the left breast the next day. There was no time to think, simply shock, and her daughter Lana, who was five months pregnant at the time, faced the possibility of losing her mom before her son came into the world. Lana and her five sisters were worried sick. The fear of the unknown, the uncertainty, and of course, in 1976, the stigma of “the big C”

What followed was sadly, worse. Hilda found herself questioning the world’s perception of femininity and struggling with her body image. While major advances were made in the 70s with the treatment of cancer with radiation, she was subjected to strong radiation for eighteen months, leaving her once soft olive complexion scarred, black, and peeling. Stiff joints, tiredness, dry mouth, and loss of appetite were the new normal. It made her very sick, and she struggled with depression and of course, the constant fear that the cancer would spread.

Hilda’s daughters lived in a state of unpredictability. Their mother was all they had, thoughts of losing her crossed Lana and her sister’s minds and left them panic-stricken and anxious. During this time Lana gave birth to her son, Nithia, and the joy of early motherhood was tangled with juggling emotions such as fear, worry, and uncertainty. Throughout this entire time, Hilda drew nearer and nearer to God and relied heavily on her faith and the support from the catholic church.

After five years, in 1979, Hilda went into remission. From her devastating diagnosis to the healing and transformation of her life, her faith kept her strong and guided her way. She was uplifted by the power of faith and family. She lived a further 24 years and passed away peacefully after receiving her last communion and sacrament from the Priest. She told her daughters what flowers she would like to have at her funeral and breathed her last breath on a Saturday morning in 2000, with her daughter at her bedside.

Today, Lana is 72. Nithia is 46 and his little sister Natasha, is 41. Although Natasha only knew Hilda for 18 years, she remembers her fondly as a kind granny, who let her plait her beautiful white hair. She was fluent in Xhosa and Zulu and loved to sing. Natasha grew up to be a naughty and feisty teenager, and a strong-willed, hard-working woman, reminiscent of the warrior her grandmother once was.

Lana’s advice to all women is not to be as stubborn as her precious mother. Hilda must have known something was amiss. All ladies need to check themselves regularly, early detection is important, if Hilda had been more gracious to her own body, and less strong-willed, she could have avoided losing her breast or prevented radiation. Draw nearer to God and your family.
 
For Hilda, granny of Natasha Tyron (Senior IT Recruitment Consultant, Network IT Recruitment)